|Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road...|
|Arsene Wenger |
"From my position in the dug-out I did not see the incident clearly so I cannot really comment. However, I do think that he gets picked on by opposition players and fans who are clearly chickenophobic."
"To be fair, he's just a baby chicken really and crossing the road is just a big exciting adventure for him. He'll enjoy the experience as long as it lasts and learn from it, but I don't seriously expect him to cross it this season."
"As far as I'm concerned he crossed the road at least a minute early according to my watch."
"I want good, solid team of chickens who'll cross the road in a straight line when they're told and how they're told. There's no room at this club for a prima donna chicken running around aimlessly - he's not worth it!"
"When the fish are down, he'll just be one of the chaps. It doesn't matter to me whether he's an Italian, French or English chicken as long as he's willing to die on the pitch."
"Just cross the f***ing road, you chicken f***!"
"The chicken was hit by the lorry when crossing the road because in a previous life it had been a bad chicken."
"If God had wanted chickens to cross roads he'd have put corn in the tarmac. Anyway, I'm more interested in Wild Turkey."
"Spotter's badge, Clive. For me, Chicko's popped up at the back stick, little eyebrows, and gone bang! And I'll tell you what - I've got a sneaking feeling that this road's there to be crossed."
"I am hoping to see some sexy poultry."
"I'm really proud of the wee fella. Let's face it, if it had been one of the big chickens everyone would be saying how well he'd done, but as it's one of the wee chickens it must be luck."
"Two months ago that chicken was saying he was happy here. Now he tells me he wants to cross the road. I feel like shooting him."
"OK, so the chicken's dead, but I still feel, hey, he can go all the way to the other side of the road."
"I can't understand why they're letting female chickens cross roads these days. They should be at home laying eggs."
"Goose, what turkey, is there a duck somewhere, where am I?"