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Elephant
A man walks into the doctors surgery, he can't even sit down. The doctor asks "What’s the problem with you today? You seem to be in a lot of pain".
The man says he has an embarrassing thing to show him. The doctor explains that he has seen everything possible in his years as a doctor, therefore nothing will shock him.
So the man proceeds to drop his trousers and bend over. The doctor gasps and says "What on earth happened to you?!! You have a massive hole in your bottom". The man explained that he had just been on holiday in Africa. "I was raped by a male elephant" said the man.
At this point the doctor said, if this were true you wouldn’t be as damaged as that because the penis on a male elephant isn’t that large.
At this point the man said "Yes I know that, but he fingered me first"

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