All Categories
4.4Sydney radio - This is a corker
4.3The best 'dear john' letter ever
4.3Jimmy Carr Quotes...
4.3Top 5 Snappy Answers
4.2Long winded, but worth the read
4.1If you ever get pulled over for speeding!
4.1Council and housing association complaints
4.0Job Application
4.0Why Men Shouldn't Write Advice Columns
3.9Job Interview 'Killer Question'
more...




Homer on Beer
Homer: Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.

Homer: Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die.

Homer: Son, a woman is a lot like a... a refrigerator! They're about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice, and... um... [spots his can of Duff] Oh, wait a minute. Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! [downs the beer] But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!

Homer: All right brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But let's just get me through this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.
Homer's brain: It's a deal!

Bart: Hey, Dad, can I have a sip of your beer?
Homer: Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake IDs.

Homer: To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems.

Homer: Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get.

Homer: I take a whiskey drink, I take a chocolate drink, and when I have to pee I use the kitchen sink.

Homer: Your honor, I'd like to represent myself. Drunken hicks of the jury.

Homer: Ah beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel if you will.

Homer: Marge send the kids to the neighbors. I'm coming home loaded.

Homer: I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.

current rating: 2.52 (438 votes)
rate this joke:
12345
terribleexcellent
Category List : Bar Jokes : Drink
Category List : Famous People : Homer Simpson
Random Joke

Latest Jokes
3.3More Horsemeat Jokes... Now With Added Shergar
3.4Horsemeat Jokes
2.9The ultimate ethnic joke
3.8Monkey
1.7Knock Knock 8
1.1Interupting sheep
2.1Snake School
2.4Scared Numbers
2.3Olympic Tan
2.3Job Applications

Subscribe to our Friday Joke email and receive the funniest jokes every Friday, totally free and with no ads.
Click here for more details
, or just enter your email address and press subscribe

unsubscribe
Casino Classic - Play with up to 500 FREE for 1 hour and keep any winnings!!!
20010 - Bitscape ltdContact Us | Privacy Policy